SO A LOT of you are STILL asking why I'm still single. Well, I've already answered that a year ago with this entry. That was a long answer and the short answer is - yes, I am indeed that choosy. Plus add it to the fact that good men are starting to become extinct lately. Echoing the ukulele-strumming Jack Johnson, Where'd all the good people go? I've been changing channels. I don't see them on the TV shows. Where'd all the good people go? We got heaps and heaps of what we sow...
However, just last month, I met a man whom I'd be willing to get married to in a heartbeat. No questions asked. He possesses all the qualities I'm looking for in a potential lifetime mate and more. But the one basic thing that attracted me to him is this - the greatness of his character.
Let me tell you a few things I learned about character -
"A talent is formed in stillness, a character in the world's torrent." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (German poet), 1749
"How true Daddy's words were when he said: all children must look after their own upbringing. Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right paths, but the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands." - Annelies Marie "Anne" Frank, 1929.
"We live in a day when image is placed over character, and I'm angry about it. When the chips are down and life is down to its basics, I don't care how he looks or how he sounds. I care what he is, I care how he thinks. I care what he represents!" - Charles R Swindoll, 1934.
For me, the character of a person determines how he responds to any given adversity or temptation. It is definitely not something that can be achieved overnight, but rather the result of a long process of living and struggling through life's difficulties. In a world of moral erosion, character is what makes a man or a woman stand out.
So what's so great about the character of this man I met just a month ago?
For one, he not only knows the truth but he fights for it. He is a principled man and it shows in how he speaks and how he treats people around him. When I ask him questions, he pauses and thinks first before answering. He looks into my eyes when I'm talking. He knows how to listen well. He doesn't pretend that he knows everything, but often admits that he doesn't really know a lot. When he promises to do something, he will really do it. He always says thank you.
He is honest. He tells facts without adding anything to them. He is always quick to inform me if it's a given fact or it's just his own opinion. He is very humble. He never talks about himself. The only times he does are when he is honoring God and when he is honoring his country. He is very brave.
He is modest. He buys the same style of shoes not because they are fashionable but because they work for him well. His living room does not contain plastic action figures or photos of himself but tons and tons of books that he is actually reading. He eats healthy and encourages me to do the same. His idea of a perfect date does not involve the bed or alcohol but a day spent having good conversations over tuna sandwiches.
He is good friends with a lot of people, even those people who don't share the same beliefs or religion. When I needed to go to the toilet urgently in the middle of an open sea, he didn't roll his eyes or make faces. He kindly took me to a secluded spot with overgrown bushes and went away so I could relieve myself. He loves to sing to me while playing the piano or his guitar.
The time that he brought me to the airport and said goodbye, he touched my face with the palm of his hand not out of lust or with malice but only with pure and tender sincerity. He is a true gentleman.
He makes me good pastrami sandwiches, too.
The name of the man who I'd be willing to marry in a heartbeat is Arie Bar-David. He is 64 years old with eight grandchildren and lives in the outskirts of Jerusalem, Israel. He is happily married to Esther who looked like Kirsten Dunst when she was in her 20s. I consider Arie as one of my living heroes.
Unless I find someone who has at least a quarter of Arie's character, I guess I would never settle then.
I would be more than fine just being single. =)
*Credit goes to WJNTY's blog post for giving me the inspiration.
Chronicles of daily struggles, learning experiences, epiphanies, childlike surrenders, failures, and breakthroughs of an expat's wife
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Sunday, December 18, 2011
My Creative Christmas Gifts
Earlier this month, I promised myself not to be caught up in the mad rush of holiday gift-buying. I'm starting to find all these commercialism and profit-making attitude surrounding Christmas to be really unnecessary, not to mention detrimental to our savings accounts. In addition, this gift-giving tradition built around this season tends to make people expectant of something that shouldn't be mandatory, but which now appears to be. On top of these, I've observed that Christmas gift manufacturers deprive people of the ability to exercise creativity in their giving. Every shop I go to, I see toys, toiletries, chocolates, and basically all kinds of commodity that are already part of our weekly grocery list - only wrapped in cute boxes and colorful packaging ready to be given away. Maybe I'm missing it, but what is so cool about them? (Note: To those who have given me those kinds of gifts, thank you so much. I sincerely appreciate it. But more than them, I cherish our friendships more. I'm not complaining. Please read on and you'll understand me.)
Unfortunately for me, I've already been suckered into buying a few of those re-packaged goods before I came to this realization : p. Good thing I came across this article published online by Girlfriends in God encouraging women to think about giving meaningful and creative gifts from the heart. So I thought about it and challenged myself to be different this time. If you know me personally, you'd know that one thing I truly value is friendship/relationship. It's true and obvious that giving gifts is one way to cultivate friendships but lately I realize that the gifts I've been giving people won't stand a long time in their drawer, much more so in their memories.
It's so easy to pick any item in a department store to give as a gift, but what's been a struggle for me is to give a part of my time away. Nobody should mess up with my "me-times". They're valuable and should not be wasted away with interactions outside of my comfort zones. But then again, if I remain that way, I would be depriving myself of a great investment, a lot of brainwork, and most of all a bunch of good times!
So my dear friends who are reading this, be prepared to receive something different from me this year.
Drum roll please...
These are coupons that would entail the holder to enjoy the activity printed on the card. =) I have friends who are working moms and I know the babysit voucher would be a great help.
What about you? How will you be creative with your Christmas gifts?
Unfortunately for me, I've already been suckered into buying a few of those re-packaged goods before I came to this realization : p. Good thing I came across this article published online by Girlfriends in God encouraging women to think about giving meaningful and creative gifts from the heart. So I thought about it and challenged myself to be different this time. If you know me personally, you'd know that one thing I truly value is friendship/relationship. It's true and obvious that giving gifts is one way to cultivate friendships but lately I realize that the gifts I've been giving people won't stand a long time in their drawer, much more so in their memories.
It's so easy to pick any item in a department store to give as a gift, but what's been a struggle for me is to give a part of my time away. Nobody should mess up with my "me-times". They're valuable and should not be wasted away with interactions outside of my comfort zones. But then again, if I remain that way, I would be depriving myself of a great investment, a lot of brainwork, and most of all a bunch of good times!
So my dear friends who are reading this, be prepared to receive something different from me this year.
Drum roll please...
These are coupons that would entail the holder to enjoy the activity printed on the card. =) I have friends who are working moms and I know the babysit voucher would be a great help.
What about you? How will you be creative with your Christmas gifts?
Monday, December 5, 2011
4pm in Israel
As soon as we arrived at the Yad Hashmona Kibbutz Hotel, in a village located a few kilometers away from Jerusalem City, we were greeted by the beautiful sunset and I was inspired to write another poem -
A magnificent gradient of red and yellow
A backdrop of shooting colors in the heavens glowed
Slack-jawed in the beauty that I see
I regret every moment when I questioned You if you truly loved me
The orange sun peeking through pillows of clouds
Creates some notions and inner doubts
Is this the sunrise which is the beginning of a new day
Or is this nighttime when all brightness fades away?
Pretty much how Your will works out
Incomprehensible at the start
Questionable in the middle
Unacceptable because I know so little
But a perfect masterpiece once fulfilled and has settled
Father, thank You for sunrises and sunsets
For fulfilled promises and seemingly unchangeable regrets
Thank You for keeping me guessing all the time
What matters now is You, the Creator of the universe, calls me Mine.
A magnificent gradient of red and yellow
A backdrop of shooting colors in the heavens glowed
Slack-jawed in the beauty that I see
I regret every moment when I questioned You if you truly loved me
The orange sun peeking through pillows of clouds
Creates some notions and inner doubts
Is this the sunrise which is the beginning of a new day
Or is this nighttime when all brightness fades away?
Pretty much how Your will works out
Incomprehensible at the start
Questionable in the middle
Unacceptable because I know so little
But a perfect masterpiece once fulfilled and has settled
Father, thank You for sunrises and sunsets
For fulfilled promises and seemingly unchangeable regrets
Thank You for keeping me guessing all the time
What matters now is You, the Creator of the universe, calls me Mine.
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