Last night, we threw a bridal shower for our dearest friend, Nips. She is getting married in three days and we couldn't have been happier and more excited as we blessed her with touching messages and meaningful bridal gifts to "send her off" to the next season waiting for her. Joanne, Nips' best friend since college, facilitated and gave a message centered on Revelation 19. Jo used the upcoming wedding of our friend and all the phases leading to it to create a beautiful metaphor of what our relationship with our "Groom" should look like. She asked us tough questions and I sensed my heart coming undone.
You see I've been going through rough valleys these past few months. I was filled with negativity, anxiety and weariness. Things were not looking up and I sensed myself to have fallen behind this race. The prayers coming out of my mouth never seemed to get past the ceiling. I was close to the Fire but my heart's never been this cold.
Jo reminded us last night that Jesus performed his first miracle in a wedding (at Cana). Why of all occasions, a wedding? Because a wedding or a marriage is the closest depiction that we will ever have of an invitation from God. Jesus has sacrificially and lovingly chosen us to be His bride. He redeemed us and clothed us with white garments of holiness and righteousness - qualities impossible to attain.
As I sat there listening to Nips talk and witnessing her prepare for one of the most important events in her life, my tears fell as I also witnessed God's love and beauty. He has truly made everthing fell beautifully into place for Nips. The mistakes, the heartbreaks, the waiting, the struggles - God used all of these to bring her to this point. Right at that moment, I felt Him so real again and I couldn't help but worship and fall in love all over again.
What have I been doing all along? Wallowing my life away because of the things I do not have when I needed to prepare for a special event myself? His coming.
Last night, I felt something within me opened up, and for the nth time in my tender age of 29, I surrended to Him again. God is really mind-blowing. He has this uncanny way of putting you in seemingly dry areas but always providing sweet, romantic oases along our deserts' way.
Yes, I am head over heels with the One who has been head over heels in love with me first.
