Fast Tense

I didn't know that I could make it, but I did. I survived a 7-day fast (sans mood swings and faint episodes)! Our church recently called for a corporate fast to start the year petitioning for breakthroughs and miracles, and I eagerly joined in. I believe it is the only way to inform God how serious I am in laying down all my heart's desires. Jesus gave me His Word, "You can pray for anything, and if you've believed that you received it, it will be yours." So holding on to that promise, I committed myself to forego of the things that keep me from having more time with Him: eating 3 meals (or more) a day, blogging, FB-ing, and sleeping (too much) for one week.

I went on one day at a time, fighting the temptation to eat more than one meal a day. I guess one motivation for me was knowing that Jesus fasted for 40 days and I was only doing it for 7 days. How shameful!

I also went to the one-hour prayer meetings after office. The place was quite a distance from where I live and the fact that I wouldn't be able to eat when I got back home gave me a somber spirit as I took the dreadedly loooong mrt ride in one of those nights.

I sat on one of the train chairs and rested my head on the cold divider ready to close my eyes, when all of a sudden a baby boy started screaming. I looked to see what was happening. His mother was pulling her up but he wanted to stand on his own. She lifted him to carry him against her chest as the train moved along. But the crying child wanted to be free. He was shrieking as he tried to pull away from his mother's grasp.

Right then, I wanted to scream back. I was hungry, tired, and irritated. The last thing I wanted was a noisy baby throwing tantrums in front of me. Right then, I so wanted to tell the kid that his mom was pulling him in because she knew he would surely fall. He couldn't stand perfectly on his own yet, especially with the moving wheels beneath his feet. I thought to myself, if only he knew then he wouldn't scream, shriek, and struggle. Aaaaargh!

Suddenly, something tugged within me. Watching that scene was like watching my life and other people's. I realized that we are the same kid who shriek, yank, and struggle. God wants to pull us in for safety, but we couldn't understand - yet. If only we knew...